Non-Attachment

There is nothing like living your entire life in two backpacks. I can quite literally leave on the drop of a hat [Hold on. Just. Let me. Squeeze. This. Last. Bag. In. This. Other. Bag. There we go.]

I’ve definitely had friends who do the travel consultant life and say that they hate living out of a suitcase.

But honestly, right now I love it. I can pick up two bags and be 100% good for as long as I need to be in any condition. I love the preparedness, the stoicism, of needing nothing but what you can carry.

Obviously romanticized.
Of course.
Jeez it’s like you don’t even read my blog….

[JK I love all you reading, and I’m very grateful you would spend any time with me. Please give me feedback if you have any. Big hugs]

But moreso this life gives freedom. See, my things had a tendency to own me. [Palahniuk] More clothes meant more laundry. And wait, you have to separate delicates from knitted from bleeding red shirts.

More hobbies meant more maintenance. Bike, running shoes, blog, floors, kitchen counters, technology updates.

Every subscription you pay for, don’t use, and feel guilty about.

Juggling credit card rewards and loyalty rewards and goddamnit where is that punchcard? Only 4 more until a free sandwich! [with purchase of equal or greater value sandwich]

The things just started taking over. Because I wanted nice things.

And I still do want nice things; I’ve got gadgets a plenty [have you seen my Drone. Footage? Or this GoPro.]

And I despise losing things. Now more than ever, even when I barely have things to lose!

It’s like, goddamn. I’m just wired into my possessions, like under a magic spell.

But here I am. Nothing holding me down, minus the cost of a train ticket. Soon to be solved via ALL THE TRAIN TICKETS. [JR Passes are good if you plan on jumping around A LOT on the specific JR line. That means cross country for a week or 2 or 3. But you can find cheaper regional JR passes, generally a better choice]

Even without a ticket, as long as I walk on, I will find a way.

I’m as close as I can get to non-attachment, don’t @ me. I know some of you got bigger stories.

-

But as I approach each Shinto shrine and Buddhist temple, I don’t find myself less attached. I find myself more attached. This world is an amazing, beautiful place. I want to experience all of it, in all its glory, and I don’t want it taken away.

These experiences aren’t only mine to possesses, and that’s made very clear from the number of tourists that gunk up any good view or worthwhile restaurant.

But these moments are mine in eternity, and I want to savor them and keep their memories. I found this life in three weeks to be more astonishing than the last year put together. Who needs the club when I can climb a mountain, write haikus, and eat in new restaurants over the course of a couple of hours. [And still make the club at night.]

Yoga in parks. Cherry blossoms, koi fish, oceans, island, mountains, dams.

What I’ve lost in things, I’ve gained in places, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

But if this is my life, I don’t want it to go. I don’t care how my bones might end up resting in the rootknot of a mighty yew. I just don’t want to die!

Can I say that?

I don’t want to die.

I want to live my wondrous and beautiful life. I want to fill my eyes with awe and enlightenment. My mouth with flavor and texture. My nose with the scent of new flowers and my heart with open love and my groin with sweet release. My feet with distance and altitude. My hands with the mighty trunks of trees, the clear water waves, bright polished brass, and the cacophony of prayer bells.

This world is wide and beautiful, every time you take 10 minutes to open your eyes.

I plan to keep mine wide open as I stumble head first into every nook and cranny my tired old body will get me into. That includes yours if I’m able. [It’s not you it’s me]

And yet, isn’t this attachment? To the time? What is this weird ying and yang that means I want to live but don’t want to be devoted to this mortal anchor, gnarled roots to this plane of existence.

I think maybe that’s the wish I have every time I stare at the stars. The planets and galaxies above me whisper that they’re something more. That I might find it when I lose everything and gain something new, yet it is only centered on myself.

Non-attachment.

Ethereal love,

Winston