Practicing the art of publishing and relentless Optimism against the INEVITABLE flow of time and my own self consciousness by not taking it too seriously.

New York.

Terribad swim

5fr/4k/3p/2im/1fr

6x100 im,bk,fr

wd ~2100

Not a great swim, I just wanted to get in after the poor board meeting.

I'm not having a great time. It's just been awful long time that I keep working and I just don't want to do anything any more. I got in just to get in. I know I didn't have time this week to try again. 

Sigh, I can feel the waves. The greying. It's hard to keep any sort of upbeat and all the downbeats are tuned very flat. I'm wasting a lot of time on restless useless crap but I can't seem to find much motivation or energy to do anything productive. Even though, I've been grinding to just keep my head above water and meet obligations. Like, apartment is clean. Laundry is done. Dishes are done. I've even kept writing up. Been to all the events. But I want to write. I want to sit down and create. I also want to get a volunteer opportunity done, maybe two. Fuck, I have to take the time away from something. Get a workout in, yoga or lifting. Then rest. Rest. Rest. Sunday. No TIm's late. 

I'm working on it. I need to be wary of the over exertion. Make time for myself. Meditate. Sleep. 

Lift and Swim

Swim to win